Title: I Will Always Love You (songfic)

Author: Suja suja@globalnet.co.uk

Spoilers: Graduation Day, any B/A episode

Summary: Summer before college.

Authors Notes: Doesn't the song "I will Always Love You" sound so like Angel's perspective....

Distribution: If you want it, you've it got - just tell me where its going.

Disclaimer: I wish they were mine, Angel espesh, but they're not. "I Will Always Love You" is a Whitney Houston song, i think originally Dolly Parton.

As I turn the lights off, I'm gripped by the urge to turn the radio on. It's something thats habit, one of those sweet things that Angel used to do for me. Most nights, when I got in from patrol early enough, I used to turn on the radio, and he used to dedicate me love songs. At midnight each night. Out of pure habit, and a longing to feel sorry for myself, I give into tradition and switch on my bedside radio clock.

"And to begin tonight's witching hour, here's a dedication from a guy we haven't heard from for a while. This is going out from Angel - what happened to you man? to Buffy. He loves you still."

I'm dying inside. I can't believe it. it's been 2 months seen I've had any contact with him, and the one day I turn my radio on, he's dedicating a song to me. I can't think of song he could dedicate to me, since he left me.

If I should stay
I would only be in your way
So I'll go, but I know
I'll think of you every step of the way:

I will always love you

My eyes are filling up. He always knew what to say. And the message is so true.

Bitter sweet memories
That is all I'm taking with me
So goodbye, please don't cry
We both know I'm not what you need

But what he doesn't realise that he is what I need. Without him, I'm a shell. A pathetic loser, as I once called Spike. I need him so much.

I hope life treats you kind
And I hope you have all you dreamed of

All I dreamed of was Angel. So, how can he hope that I've got all I dreamed of. He says he wants me to have a "normal life".

And I wish you joy and happiness
But above all this I wish you love

I wish he did. Wish me joy, happiness and love. But he's taken it away by leaving. He's left me. And with that, he's taken away my joy, happiness and love.

I will always love you

If only there's was a way I could convince him he was wrong. Wrong to leave, and wrong to think I wanted a normal life...