Disclaimer: None of the characters you recognize from Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel belong to me.  They belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, 20th Century Fox, etc.

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DISCLAIMER:  Not mine.  Never were.  Never will be.
TIMELINE:  Continues from the Season 2 finally of AtS.
SYNOPSIS: Angel finds a way to bring Buffy back from the dead.
RATING: PG

"It's Buffy," Angel said, worry consuming his body.  Willow's face was so sad and he couldn't fathom what would cause that. "What's going on?" he asked when she just continued to look at him.

"She's dead."

Cordelia gasped and her hand flew up to her mouth.  Wesley inhaled sharply.  The Host, Fred, and Gunn stood back respectfully not really knowing what's going on, but knowing it was major.  All eyes were on Angel.  The vampire stood stock still and the look in his eyes was something beyond grief.  It was unbelieving and full of indescribable pain.  Willow walked over and embraced him, needing his support as much as he needed hers.  He tentatively put his hands on her back, still staring blankly into space.

"How?" he choked out despite the large lump forming in his throat.

"It's a long story.  Let's sit down."  Willow sat on the couch and everyone followed her.  Cordelia gently touched Angel's arm and he turned to her with cloudy eyes.

"Are you okay?"  He didn't respond.  He couldn't speak.  Willow quickly explained the situation with Dawn, Glory & Buffy.  It hurt her to do so, but she felt Angel deserved to know.

"Her funeral was yesterday," she concluded.  "We tried to call you..."

"We were in another dimension," Wesley said softly.  Angel, who had been sitting silently and stoically the whole time, stood up and spoke.

"Thanks for coming, Willow.  I appreciate it."  He turned and went upstairs to his room.  As he closed the door, the tears he had been holding back began.  The pain overwhelmed him and he fell to his knees.   Sobs viciously ripped their way out of him.  His body shook uncontrollably.  He didn't know how he'd held it back while Willow was talking, but now it was violently consuming him.

"No!" he cried. "Oh God no! Buffy, no! No! No!"  It wasn't fair.  She wasn't supposed to die.  She was so young, so beautiful, so perfect.  It should have been him.  He had done so many horrible things in his life and she was so innocent.  All she did was help people.  She sacrificed herself to save the world again.  It wasn't fair.

He grabbed an antique vase and hurled it against the wall.  It shattered loudly, but didn't satisfy his intense pain and anger.  He stood up on shaky leg with tears streaming unstoppably down his face and staggered to the bed.  He buried his face in a pillow, soaking it with the flood of his tears.  There was an aching emptiness inside him that he knew would never go away no matter how long he lived.

His mind was playing cruel tricks on him.  Memories bombarded him.  The way she made his life a little easier just by being there.  Their sweet and passionate kisses.  Tender moments they had shared.  The first time he saw her.  She was so young and innocent and she had to grow up so fast.  The first time they met in the alley behind the Bronze.  Their first kiss.  All the times they had fought side by side.  He remembered their first night together.  How her touches, kisses, and most of all her love had given him one true moment of happiness.  It was the best night of his life.  He remembered with regret all the agony he had caused her.

He remembered how she had nursed him back to health when he returned from hell.  How she had brought him back from the brink of suicide.  How she still loved him despite what he had done to her.  Their heartbreaking last dance at the prom.  Their blissful day when he was human that no one remembered but him.  He had given up his humanity to save her life, but she was gone anyway.  All he wanted was to hold her one more time and tell her how much her loved her.  The sobs continued to rack his body and did not subside until he fell into a fitful sleep.

Everyone watched as Angel calmly walked up the stairs.  Cordelia and Wesley were still in shock, but they were also very concerned about their friend.  He had seemed to take it well, but they knew Angel wasn't one to let his feelings show.

"Should someone go after him?" Fred asked shyly.

"Nah," Gunn replied.  "I think he needs some time to himself."  Suddenly, a cry and a thud came from Angel's room and everyone's head turned in surprise.  They could hear agonized crying echoing down the hall and then there was a loud crash. They all jumped a little.

"I should go," The Host said quietly and left.

"I should go too," Fred added.  "But I have nowhere to go."

"You can stay with me for a while," Cordelia offered, "but just give me a few minutes here."  She sat next to Willow and touched her shoulder.  "Do you wanna stay with me tonight?  You shouldn't have to drive."

"No, I really should get back."  Cordelia pulled the red-headed witch into a hug.

"I'm so sorry."  Willow gave a small, sad smile and then glanced upstairs.

"Tell him that she never stopped loving him," she said simply.  Cordelia hugged her again and then Willow left.  Cordelia turned to Gunn and Wesley.

"Wes, are you okay?"

"Yes.  I mean I'm quite shocked.  She was my Slayer for a short period of time and although we were never close, it is upsetting.  I'll be fine though.  How are you?"

"She was my friend.  We were not extremely close, but I still care about her.  But I'm more concerned with Angel.  Stay here, okay?  Make sure he doesn't do anything....drastic."

Angel woke up because he felt the presence of someone else in the room.  His eyes quickly adjusted to the darkness and he looked around to see a woman sitting next to him on the bed.

"Buffy," he said incredulously.

"Hi Angel," she said, smiling softly.  He sat up and his hand reached out and gently touched her arm, checking to see if she was real.

"What's going on?  I thought you were...."

"Dead.  I am, but I need your help.  I'm not supposed to be dead.  The Powers That Be don't want it this way, but they lost control because Glory was also a god.  They couldn't contain her.  Angel, there's a way to bring me back."  His eyes widened in shock.  "The Wolfram & Hart books you brought back from Pylia..."

"How do you know about that?" he interrupted.

"When you're dead, they let you know stuff.  Anyway, in the books there is a spell.  Willow is strong enough to perform it and between Giles and Wesley and the Host it can be translated."  She took her hand out of his, where it had moved to during the course of their conversation, and slipped it over his cheek.  "I love you, Angel."

"I love you too, Buffy."  She leaned in and kissed him softly, letting her lips linger on his, and then she was gone.

Angel sat for a moment in shock at what Buffy had said and the simple fact that she had been there.  Then, everything clicked and he ran downstairs.  As he rushed out of his room, he woke Wesley who had been sleeping against the wall.  He jumped to his feet and followed Angel down the stairs.

"Angel, what's going on?"

"I need to call Willow," he said continuing on his path to the office.

"Why?"

"Because we can bring Buffy back."  Angel picked up the phone and started to dial.  Wesley reached out and slammed the phone back into the cradle.

"What?"

"Buffy was here and she told me that we can bring her back."  He picked the phone up again and again Wesley hung it up.

"Angel, I understand you're hurting, but Willow and everyone else are grieving as well and you can't put them through this." Angel stared at him a moment before comprehending.

"You think I'm making this up."

"I never said that, Angel.  You love Buffy very much and it's perfectly normal for you to have trouble accepting her death.  It's logical that you would want to bring her back and you could have willed yourself to see Buffy, but it's not real.  I'm sorry, Angel."

"Wesley, listen to me.  I didn't dream it up and it wasn't part of my subconscious.  It was real.  I woke up and she was sitting there, next to me.  She told me that since Glory was a god from another dimension, the Powers That Be lost control and she's not really supposed to have died.  We need to bring her back.  The spell is in the Wolfram and Hart books from Pylia."  Angel could tell that Wesley still didn't believe him.  "Where are the books?  I'll find the spell before I call Willow."  Wesley knew Angel wouldn't be satisfied until he did this, so he agreed.

Several hours later, Angel and Wesley were still looking for a spell.  Wesley was ready to give up, but Angel was determined. He needed to bring Buffy back.  They had called the Host around 4 am to come help with translation and he agreed to come, but only at a more reasonable hour.  Four hours later, he showed up in a bright blue suit.

"So what's the deal here?"

"We're looking for something to bring back the dead."

"Oh." He sensed how important this was to Angel, so he sat down without any of his snappy comments.

Cordelia showed up with Fred an hour later.  Cordelia was glad to see that Angel wasn't locked in his room, grieving.  Feeling a strong surge of sympathy and friendly love for the vampire, she went over and gave him a hug.  He looked at her surprised.

"How are you?" she asked, really wanting to know.

"Not great," he replied honestly.  She could see the sadness in his eyes, but she could also see hope and determination.  "But I'm doing a little better.  We think there's a way to bring Buffy back.  We're looking for it now."

"How long have you been looking?"

"All night," Wesley chipped in.

"I'll make more coffee."

Angel took a research break and went into the kitchen.  He poured himself a glass of O negative and sipped it while leaning against the counter.  They had been looking at least 10 hours and come up with nothing.  Maybe seeing Buffy last night was just a dream conjured up by his grief.  But deep down he knew it was real.  He finished his blood, rinsed the glass, and wiped his mouth.  He walked back to see everyone crowded around the books.

"What's going on?"  Wesley looked up at him.

"Angel, I think we've found something."

Angel and company minus Gunn arrived in Sunnydale an hour after sundown.  Angel walked down the street confidently, but faltered at the front door of the magic shop.  He took an unnecessary breath and opened the door.  The bell jangled as he and the others stepped inside alerting the Scooby Gang to their presence.  There were awkward introductions and then Angel handed Giles the books and the rough translation of the spell the Host had put together.  Giles read the spell carefully with Willow looking over his shoulder.  The room was completely silent.  Willow beckoned to Tara, who came to her side.  They communicated silently with little gesture, then Willow spoke.

"We can do this."   Giles looked around.

"I think we have everything here."

"How soon can we do this?" Xander asked anxiously.

"We need about an hour."

Wesley, The Host, and Fred had gone to the cemetery to get Buffy's body.  Everyone else was too close to Buffy to do such a morbid task.  Cordelia stayed with Angel, giving him someone to lean on.  Willow, Tara, Giles, and Anya looked around the store for supplies.  Spike was shooting death glares at Angel, but the dark-haired vampire didn't notice.  He was too busy thinking of what was to come.  Xander and Dawn were talking quietly in the corner.

"What do you think is going to happen?" the young girl asked.

"Truthfully, Dawnie, I don't know."  A similar conversation was going on between Cordelia and Angel.

"Angel, do you think the spell is going to work?"

"I don't know, Cordy.  I really hope so."  Cordelia was about to speak again when he body convulsed and she cried out in pain.  Angel grabbed her, holding her steady as flashes of lights and images invaded her head.  Everyone look on in confusion and dismay.

"She gets visions," Angel explained.

"Since when?" Xander asked.

"It's a long story," Angel responded.  Cordelia's vision had ended and she was breathing deeply to recuperate.  "Are you okay?" Angel said, looking into her eyes.

"What'd I say about people asking me that?"  He smiled at her.  At that moment Wesley, The Host, and Fred entered.  They came in through the back and had laid Buffy out on the couch there.  Wesley saw Cordelia and Angel and knew she had a vision.

"Are you okay?  What'd you see?"

"There's a demon nest under the sixth street shelter.  They have two kids for a sacrifice that will destroy the whole block."

"We need to call Gunn," Angel said, immediately looking to Giles for a phone.

"He won't be able to handle it," Cordelia interrupted.  "We need to get back there."  Angel looked torn.  He wanted to stay and be there when Buffy was brought back, but he also felt a responsibility to deal with Cordelia's vision.  "You can stay if you want to," she said to him quietly.  Angel glanced at the door to the back room where Buffy's body and then back at everyone.  Giles nodded slightly indicating for him to stay.

"Okay."  Cordelia touched Angel's shoulder gently.  He fished in his pocket and tossed his car keys to Wesley.  "Take my car. I'll call if I need it."

"Despite the circumstances, it was nice to see you all again," Wesley said, his British manners coming out.  Cordelia & the Scooby Gang expressed the same sentiments.  After the group from L.A. sans Angel left, there was a few minutes of somber silence while everyone prepared physically and emotionally for what was about to happen.

"Is everybody ready?" Willow asked.  They nodded and filed into the back room.  Angel's heart constricted in pain at the sight of Buffy's still body.  Dawn inched closer to Xander, who already had his arm around Anya.  Spike and Angel hung to the back as Willow and Tara started the spell.  The pressure in the room increased.  Willow and Tara's voices got louder as the spell peaked.  The chanted words stopped and everything was completely still.  Everyone waited in anticipation to see if the spell worked.  Suddenly, Buffy gasped in air as her lungs began to work again.  She sat up and Dawn rushed over and threw her arms around her.

"Buffy!"  The reborn Slayer wrapped her arms around her little sister.

"Oh Dawn."  Buffy squeezed her tightly.  The younger Summers started to cry.  "It's okay, it's okay," Buffy whispered, stroking her sister's hair.  They hugged for a long time.  Buffy knew they had a lot to talk about, so she stood up and turned to her other friends.

"Hi honey, I'm home," she said smiling, trying to ease everyone's shock.  Willow made the first move.  She stepped forward and hugged her best friend.  "Thank you.  For everything," Buffy said.  "Bringing me back, looking after Dawn, and we couldn't have defeated Glory at all without you."  They hugged again and Buffy moved down the line to Tara.  "Hey, nice to have you back."

"You too."  They hugged and Buffy turned to Giles.  He looked at the young woman in front of him.  Sometimes she annoyed him greatly and before she died, things had been tense between them which was something he was sorry for.  He loved her like the daughter he never had.  She was strong, noble, and brave, but he didn't know how to tell her how proud he was of her. Instead, he hugged her tightly.  She hugged him back, knowing all the things he couldn't say.  He was more of a father to her than her own father ever was.  She would have never made it through the past five years without him.  She smiled at him, then moved on to Xander and Anya, hugging them both.

"Thanks for taking care of Dawn."

"Our pleasure," Anya said.

"I love you guys."  Buffy hugged them again.  Xander squeezed her a little tighter.  He been able to bring her back the first time she died and was devastated when he couldn't do it again.  She meant so much to him.  Buffy kissed his cheek and turned to Spike.  They stood in front of each other awkwardly until Buffy made the first move and embraced him quickly.

"Thanks for fighting," was all she said.  In defending Dawn, he had gained her trust and friendship.  She stepped back from Spike and turned to the dark haired vampire on the outskirts of the group.  She had been saving Angel for last for a very special reason.

Without warning, she grabbed him and kissed him hard.  His body responded naturally to hers, pulling her in closer, craving more contact.  A barely visible blue light surrounded the couple.  Everyone was surprised when Buffy kissed him, but was even more shocked at what Angel said when they broke apart.

"I'm alive," he whispered incredulously.  His hand flew to his chest where he could feel his heart beating.  Buffy reached up and covered his hand with hers.  Her other hand gently touched his cheek.

"A gift from the Powers That Be.  Congratulations.  You've earned it."  She leaned it and kissed him softly.  She stepped back and put her arm around Dawn's shoulders, leaving Angel in wonderment of his new found mortality.

"Wow!" Xander said, breaking the stunned silence.  "Two lives restored in one day.  We ARE good!"

Buffy walked down the hall, her hair still wet from her shower.  She could hear Angel talking on the phone to Cordelia in the kitchen.  She stood at the top of the stairs for a moment, listening to the new hint of happiness in his voice and smiling softly. Then, she continues down the hall to Dawn's room and knocked on the door softly.

"Come in."  Buffy entered and Dawn set her journal aside.  "Hey, what's up?"

"Can we talk?"  Buffy sat on the edge of the bed.

"Yeah sure."

"Do you mind Angel being here?"

"No."

"Good. He needs a place to stay tonight, but I didn't want you to be uncomfortable."

"Whatever.  Angel's pretty cool when he's not evil or brooding."  Buffy grinned at her sister's typical teenage flippancy.

"How are you doing?" Buffy said, becoming more serious.

"What do you mean?"

"A lots had happened the past few days.  How are you doing?"

"Pretty good, I guess.  I mean I didn't have anytime to adjust to you being gone and now you're back so there's not much to deal with really."

"Well I'm here if you need me, okay?"

"Yeah, same here."  Buffy smiled at her and turned to leave, when Dawn stopped her.  "Buffy, what was it like being dead?"She paused a moment considering the best way to answer.

"Truthfully, I don't remember too much.  I don't think the Powers That Be want their afterlife secrets revealed to the world.  But I'll try to explain what I can.  First, everything goes black.  Then, it feels like you're floating through space and in a way, your life flashes before your eyes.  You think about people you love.  You think about your regrets and your best moments.  Some of the moments are the most important in your life, others are unimportant but special.

"What did you think of?"

"When Mom and Dad brought you home from the hospital.  My birthday party in second grade.  The first day of junior high. When I first found out I was the Slayer.  Meeting Xander, Willow, Giles, and Angel for the first time.  The first time I died.  The day you, Dad, and I spent on the boardwalk and you won the big stuffed pink bear.  My 17th birthday.  The summer I ran away.  The week leading up to Prom and Graduation.  Mom's death.  There was a lot more, but it all came so fast."

"Oh."  Dawn didn't really know what to say.  Buffy continued the explanation of her death.

"After the flashes, I was someplace white and sparkly."  Buffy paused.  "Mom was there."  Tears sprung to Dawn's eyes quickly and unexpectedly.

"She was?" she questioned softly.  Buffy's eyes also began to tear as she thought about what she was going to say next.

"Yeah.  She's the one who told me about the spell.  She also said to tell you that she loves you and she's proud of you."  Tears started to fall from both their eyes.

"Really?"

"Yes.  And I feel the same way.  You were so brave through the whole ordeal and you were willing to sacrifice yourself to save the world."

"So were you."

"Yeah, but it's my job.  I'm the Slayer.  You're just a girl."

"I'm the key."

"No, you're my little sister.  I love you, Dawn."

"I love you too Buffy." They hugged and cried together.

Dawn had fallen asleep.  Buffy had taken time to compose herself, but it was almost a waste of time because she knew her next conversation would lead to more tears.  Buffy checked herself in the mirror and went downstairs nervously. Angel was lying on the couch with his eyes closed.

"Angel?" she said softly.  He opened his eyes and sat up.

"Buffy."

"Can we talk?"

"Sure."  Buffy sat down next to him.

"How are you?  With the new found humanity thing?"  Angel considered how to answer.  The last time he became human it was a threat to Buffy's life.  But this time he figured since the Powers That Be had given mortality to him, it would be alright.

"Okay, I guess."

"So, what's next for you?"

"I don't know."  Angel met her eyes.  "That depends on you."  Buffy's body tingled at the way he was looking at her.  His eyes encompassed love, devotion, and desire all in one glance.

"What do you mean?"

"I love you, Buffy," he said, not beating around the bush.  "I want to be with you and now we can be together.  But I realize your life has changed and I might not be what you want.  So it's up to you."  He looked down at his hands leaving her to answer.

"Angel, I love you too.  So, so much.  When I died, I realized my worst regret was not making things work between us.  And now that I have the chance, I want to be with you, but I'm scared."  Tears started to form in her eyes and she was aggravated at herself for being so emotional.  Angel took her hand and her fingers curled around his.

"Scared?" he asked.

"Yeah, I'm terrified of being with you because I know how easily I could fall into you and not be able to find my way out.  And normally I would love to just be with you and have nothing else matter, but my life won't let that happen.  Dawn needs to be my number one priority right now."

"I understand."  The fact the he was so nice about it just made things worse.  It just made Buffy love and miss him more.  A single tear fell from her eye.  Angel cupped her cheek and brushed the tear away with his thumb.  She moved her body and nestled against his chest and let a few more quiet tears fall.  She was tired and confused.  Everything in her life was changing so fast and she didn't know what to do.  She needed to be there for Dawn, but she also needed someone to lean on.  She had died for God's sakes!  But when she came back, all her responsibilities were still there and she didn't know if she could handle it.  At that moment, all she knew was sitting there with Angel's arms wrapped securely around her was the safest and happiest she had been in a long time.

"We can make this work,"  Angel said softly.  "I'll split time between Sunnydale and L.A. or something.  We'll take it slow."

"Yeah, slow would be good."  She gazed up into his chocolate yes and then down at his oh-so-kissable lips.  She leaned towards him and their lips melted together.  Buffy shifted on his lap and pressed herself closer to Angel.  She wrapped her arms around his neck and savored the sensations the soft, perfect kiss was sending through her body.  Angel finally pulled away breathless.  Buffy rested her forehead against his and closed her eyes tightly.

"Angel," she sighed.  They sat in silence for a few moments.  "Come upstairs with me," she whispered. He tilted her chin and looked deeply into her eyes.

"What happened to taking it slow?"  He gave her the famous lopsided grin that she loved so much.

"That's the rational part of me.  But every other part of me screams to be with you.  I need to give into something that just feels right.  My life is becoming all responsibility and logic..." she trailed off, trying to express her feelings accurately, but not being able to.  "I need you tonight," she said simply.  He looked down into the wide eyes that he couldn't resist.  He stood up and took her hand, pulling her off the couch.  He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her softly.

"Are you sure this is what you want?"

"Yes."

"I love you."

"I love you too."  Angel kissed her again and Buffy felt, for the first time in a long time, that her life was going to be alright.